Categories: Opinion

Mehreen Farhan

“Whether you like it or not… mein to bus aisi hi hun!

Sounds familiar?

It’s a very common occurrence in our society: one person says whatever they feels like saying, pass judgements or throw verbal jabs at the speed of light, and in the end, just chalk it up to who they are, which is often, ahem, a very honest version of them.

Honesty: a buzzword in our lives. So many hearts have been broken for no reason at all, behind the guise of one person being painfully honest.

You can’t really find a way around this deadly combination: being very honest and then stating, mein to aisi hi hun.

Now let’s go over to the victim. A victim in such cases is a gullible person. Innocent, naive, having no inkling how some people operate. Since they cannot understand that what they face is called “toxicity”, they continue being the victim. Had they understood the whole affair, they would not have been victims in the first place.

This is a classic form of toxicity.

You thought you had the place to pass judgment or upset someone with your words and then chalked it up being clear hearted. That’s not how it goes. What good is your clarity of hearts if all you do with it is break more hearts?

And no, you cannot expect to be treated like a princess each time you say “mein to aisi hi hun” when what you just did, was take a vicious dig at the other person.

I wish we reach our youth that people should be respected only when they do things that earn respect. An initial respect that you have for people you just met is from your own goodness. But to tolerate toxic behavior, be a pawn in someone’s hand, indulge them in their idea of control, is wrong. And not needed.

No elder in their right minds will ask it from you to be degraded over and over at the hands of toxic family members.

I really want parents to teach their children to know the what respect is and how someone earns it. If we force our young people to not question toxic behavior, it affects their confidence in their own decisions. They will learn that they have to get used to being run over. That’s something you never want to have in your children because it sets the tone of how they live their lives.

As victims, or as leaders.

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Leave A Comment

  1. Farzeen Lehra January 3, 2021 at 9:10 pm

    So true!!!

  2. Salima Noorani September 14, 2021 at 6:37 pm

    What you rightly pointed out is a cause for concern. Freedom of expression, in the name of honesty, is used as a license to create massive destruction. This is true at all levels whether it’s individual, family or society.

    And as for tolerating toxic behavior, for most people, it is all they know how to operate. It is too prevalent and there is no quick fix. Damage is already done. It is going to take a long time, probably several generations to reverse the situation,

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